Je Suis En Vie!

It seems like life has a funny way of coming full circle. It was barely three years ago when I got entangled in almost exactly the same situation.. It almost makes me want to laugh out loud at the absurdity of it all.

But now.. it doesn't seem to matter so much anymore that he doesn't know. It doesn't matter so much anymore that he doesn't care. In spite of my natural inclination to become melancholic, this time I find that I can hold my head up and smile. I think I'm finally realizing that life has so much more to offer than dreams.

And just because something seems special now, will not make it so a few days, weeks or months down the line. Sure, it isn't the most pleasant feeling to realize that feelings aren't reciprocated. But at the same time, it really isn't the end of the world.

I've never felt more alive in my life than I do at this moment, as I listen to My Confession (current obsession!) and rid myself of the cynicism that made me react the way I did when I first found out... Self-worth is hard to come by, but there's a lot to be said for it! Every time something like this happens, I learn a bit more about myself, about how strong I can be...

And I'm quite pleasantly surprised that I'm learning to deal with the fallout of falling for someone I knew all along I would never stand a chance with, with a lot more maturity than I once thought myself capable of!

It's really very funny, but I do think I'm finally growing up! :)